a new hope

There is a place in the world, well, technically Nevada, that I think would appeal to a lot of people, if they only knew about it. Almost every casino has one, and while they ferociously protect one of your civil liberties, they cruelly deny you of another. It's fantastic.

What I am speaking of, is the sports book, where all gambling wagers are placed and collected within the confines of a casino. Now, these places exist in the world wide interweb, but that is not of what I speak. I'm talking about the place made of lost dreams and brick and concrete.

See, they let you smoke, but they don't let you talk on your cell phone. It is against the laws of that land. Someone explained it to me once, but it was confusing, and I started daydreaming about that really good Ozma album. But they will yell at you. And they will throw pencils at you. And then they will call security. I've seen all of that happen. All over a cell phone, too.

I think there needs to a documentary made about the ups and downs of a sports book. Notice I didn't say 'reality show'. I'm talking about a sweeping, Ken Burns' style epic here. The drama writes itself. Bets being won and lost on the last second most trivial of plays. Oh! I can feel the letdown welling up inside of me already. We'd see the high-rolling kid catch a bad break and be out $10,000. The lovable but career loser finally win a trifecta on a horse race, only to blow it all on the Ohio St.-Michigan game. Or the accountant from Des Moines who gets way in over his head, and has to make that call to his wife. And we end with a happy site, around all that pain, as one of the bet takers goes home to his family, and we see his daughter greet him, and his wife give him a big hug.

If you have never placed a sports bet, then you can't know the excitement of rooting for something so meaningless other than to your own pocket book. It's fantastic. Something that has no weight in the world outside your little smoke filled section of a casino. This would win an Oscar. I have no doubt in my mind.